Wednesday, October 19, 2011 9:24 PM

It's all in my mind.

每个人对于自己要成为一个什么样的人,都会有一个自我设计。但就有人觉得自己这也不行那也不好,觉得现实中的自己距离设计中的自己相差太多而痛苦。其实,这些人忽视了一个现实:人人都有缺陷,就像玉上面总有些黑点,但有点瑕疵才是真的。

有一位腿有残疾的人,经过十几年的奋斗,终于成了遐迩闻名的雕刻家。有人对他说:“你如果不是有残疾,恐怕会更有成就。”他却淡然处之,说:“你说的也许有道理,但我不感到遗憾。如果没得小儿麻痹症,我早当了农民,哪有时间学习,掌握一技之长?我应该感谢上帝让我有残疾。” 英国首相丘吉尔,1953年获诺贝尔奖,但他曾是一个贪睡、贪酒、吸食鸦片的人,但他经过不懈的努力,改掉了自己的缺陷,成就了伟大的事业。追求完美是人类的天性之一,有了它,人类才会永不满足地向前发展。我们要努力追求完美,但同时我们必须学会接纳我们的不完美。

不能接纳自己的不完美,源自我们常常拿理想的自我与现实的自我进行比较而产生的焦虑感。理想的自我是要经过不懈的努力才能接近而始终不能百分之百达到的一个目标,只要每天进步一点,我们离目标就近了一点。倘若因为不能接纳自己的缺陷而痛苦,只能使我们离目标越远。不能接纳自己的不完美,还源自和别人不正确的比较而产生的自卑感。拿自己于的缺点于别人的优点比,比较的结果自己总是相形见绌。

其实,每个人都足以让自己确立自信的长处。“一棵树,如果花不鲜艳,也许叶子会绿得青翠;如果花和叶子都不漂亮,也许枝干会长得错落有致。”

德国文学家席勒曾经写过一篇童话:一个圆的一个部分被切去了,它希望自己是一个完美的圆,因此它四处去寻找它遗失的那一部分。由于不是一个完美的圆,所以它只能慢慢滚动,因此能沿途欣赏草的芬芳,阳光的灿烂。有一天,它终于找到了自己遗失的那部分,它又是一个完善的圆。它飞快地滚动,在滚动中发现许多美好的东西都失去了,它十分沮丧,于是它停下来,毫不犹豫地将千辛万苦找回的部分丢在路边,然后慢慢滚动着……

人生就是如此,不完美才是真的,只要我们真诚地面对,有点缺憾,人生照样精彩。

(copied from 理解问答练习 07)

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May we only do things that can withstand the scrutiny of the world.





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Tan Jing Yee
River Valley High School
RVNP HotShots! (sec1'08)
Shuqun Primary School
28 July



~ some quotes ~

♥ But I think... I want to live with all my memories. Even if they're bad memories. Even if they're memories that only hurt me... that I'd rather forget. If I keep them and keep trying, without running away, then someday I'll be strong enough that those memories can't defeat me. I believe that because I want to think that there's no such thing as a memory that's ok to forget.

♥ Pain, suffering. It's pointless to just think about those things. The traveler (referring to "The Most Foolish Traveler" by Natsuki Takaya) didn't. That may be stupid to some people but that's not stupid to me. Yuki... Kyo... when you close your eyes, what do you think?

♥ Just as no matter how hard you try to keep it away... despair will attack you again and again. In the same manner hope will return to you. Again and again.

♥ Someday... no matter how cold it is now... the snow will melt. Without fail.

♥ For there to be pain, there has to be kindness. For darkness to stand out, there has to be the sun.

♥ Maybe I'm not perfect. Maybe I have a long way to go. But someday... someday I'll be able to stand and walk on my own. Without hurting anyone... and without being a burden.

♥ We're all born with selfish desires so we can relate to those feelings in others. But kindness is created individually by each person... So it's easy to misunderstand when someone is trying to be kind to you... But, Tohru, people's differences are something to celebrate.

♥ "And if when everything ends, nothing is left in my hands...that's alright."

♥ Mingling with people, hurting them, getting hurt by them. That's how you learn about people and about yourself. If you don't, you'll never care about anyone but yourself.

♥ I want to be the only one... who can help the one I care about.

♥ "I wish I could have lived... In a kind world. Without anxiety. Without fear. Without hurting other people. Without being hurt myself. Only doing the right things. I wish I could have followed... The shortest path... To the kind world I wish for. I wish... I could have lived my life... Without making any wrong turns. But that is impossible. A path like that doesn't exist. We fail. We trip. We get lost. We make mistakes. And little by little, one step at a time... we push forward. It's all we can do. On our own two feet. Even if we get a little banged up. Someday, we'll reach something. We'll reach someone. We pray."

♥ "Crowds used to make me wonder. How many people would notice if I disappeared? I used to mull over that kind of thing constantly... once upon a time. But now... I'm a little different. It's not like that. It doesn't have to be... A lot of people. Even if it's just one person. That's enough. Having one person... is an incredible thing. Because then... It can't be zero. I was happy. I was happy then, too. I was so happy, it tickled. In the midst of all those people... She singled me out... and found me. And it's the same thing now. Having someone other than yourself... thinking of you. Looking... for you. You can't take that for granted. It's a miraculous and blessed thing."

♥ "... please don't cry anymore. I know that happy things... and fun things.. eventually come to an end. But things that are scary and sad... come to an end too. They always do. Even if you can't always believe that... please don't give up. Live. I want you to live. Even if you make a mistake, even if you take the long way, it's still okay... Just please... please live. Don't give up on pushing forward. Please. At least don't give up on that. Even if I'm not... by your side."

♥ Often times in memory, we have the tendency to overly romanticize the people we care about.

♥ Humans may be fragile creatures, but they're not weak to the extent to being crushed by their painful memories even after they meet with something unfortunate. We're far more resilient that that. Everything will be alright.

♥ "Don't worry, Kanade. What a person has actually gone through is unexpectedly different from what he remembers. Even though that gap may leave him feeling sad sometimes... Even the most vivdly clear memory... will change with time eventually."

♥ "Humans are amazing. Even though they may not see something physically... They'll still sense it. Everything else is the same. If you work hard, others will know that you work hard. If you don't work hard, others will know that you don't work hard."

♥ "Someday... You'll find someone who'll know all your good and bad points... And who'll still love you all the same."

♥ If... There was ever a Land of the Blindfolded, will the people of that land... Understand what it's like to have your blindfold come undone? Even if... Most people will never understand us... There might just be... Someone who can do that. It isn't easy to understand people's feelings... But that doesn't mean... That you're alone.

♥ It is not violence that best overcomes hate — nor vengeance that most certainly heals injury.

♥ The real courage is living and suffering for what you believe.

♥ “If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. i'll always be with you.”

♥ Do not pity the dead, Harry, pity the living. Above all pity those who live without love.

♥ 每一段记忆,都有一个密码。只要时间,地点,人物组合正确,无论尘封多久,那人那景都将在遗忘中重新拾起。你也许会说“不是都过去了吗?”其实过去的只是时间,你依然逃不出,想起了就微笑或悲伤的宿命,那种宿命本叫“无能为力”。




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